Scratching your head over why you are still single? Before you panic, don’t sweat it: this does not mean there’s anything “wrong” with you.
It is very easy for some people to fall in love and others don’t find it easy.
Life isn’t all out to catch you, you are where you are because of the choices you make daily. Your relationship status is within your control.
Disclaimer: The reason for this article isn’t to stereotype all single ladies/guys or to put anyone in a box. However, for people, particularly those that are of marriageable age, who are looking for answers to the puzzling question “Why am I still single?” here are some unconventional answers that lie within.
1. YOU’RE TOO FOCUSED ON YOUR CAREER:
You worked hard to the point you are at your career and you want to keep the momentum going.
Falling in love is like compromising your career growth. You want to make your sacrifice worth it and you end up working long and crazy hours.
It leads to a vicious cycle, because you’re working way too hard to put in the necessary effort to find a partner.
And every time you meet someone that seems like a good match, you keep on warning them that they’re not going to be your first priority and that they should get out while they still can. And sadly enough, they listen.
2. YOU’RE TOO IN LOVE WITH SINGLE LIFE:
When you love being single you have a very empowering feeling. You love the fact that you don’t need to answer to anyone and you don’t have attachments that are going to interfere with your plans.
You don’t want anyone invading your space because you are capable to sort your bills and you have all it takes to be successful alone.
3. NO ONE HAS MET YOUR EXPECTATION:
You are picky and judgmental. Expectations such as looks, status, wealth, job, height, hair color, body shape, etc. are too often high on the list of the single ideal partner.
Social media has really played a lot in this aspect, you log on to Instagram and you see perfect looking couples basking in their luxury vacations and feel that you need to find a partner where you can also achieve this appearance.
There is a conflict of expectations — people spend time chasing shadows; what they can’t have but reject the great prospects that are a truly better fit.
4. LOW SELF ESTEEM:
They have the belief that no worthwhile person will fall in love with them. Their critical inner voices comes to play here, saying stuffs like, ‘you are too fat’, ‘your are too ugly’, ‘you are too boring’. They tend to engage in behaviours that push people away.
Lack of confidence gives people this idea that you are not being open.
You just love retreating into your comfort zone.
After a long day’s work, many people may feel more like putting on pajamas and crawling into bed than going out into the uncertain and anxiety-provoking world of meeting people.
The critical inner voice will be offering soothing words like, ‘You are fine on your own, don’t go out today’.
A lot of the activities we use to “comfort” ourselves actually make us feel bad in the end, as they result in us avoiding pursuing what we really want in life.
It is important to not fall into a comfort zone and resist that inner voice.
Also read: RED FLAGS YOU CAN SPOT ON A FIRST DATE